On Sunday, during my coffee shop time, I read the second section (February) of "Diary of and Old Soul". It fit right in with the many other lines of thought I was entertaining that day: suffering, emotional healing, walls, and mystery. As I glance over the poem again for this post, something new has grabbed my attention. This morning, with a great number of tasks before me, I allowed myself to feel anxious and irritable. I didn't enjoy my children or our our school time. I knew that I was making the choice to stay in that ugly attitude, too. God kept nudging me, "Come here. Wake up. Fall Down. Be at rest." I fought him. I wish I wouldn't do that.
Here are the stanzas that are speaking to my heart now:
14.
My soul must unawares have sunk awry.
Some care, poor eagerness, ambition of work,
Some old offence that unforgiving did lurk,
Or some self-gratulation, soft and sly--
Something not thy sweet will, nor the good part,
While the home-guard looked out, stirred up the old murk,
And so I gloomed away from thee, my Heart.
15.
Therefore I make provision, ere I begin
To do the thing thou givest me to do,
Praying, -- Lord, wake me oftener, lest I sin.
Amidst my work, open thine eyes on me,
That I may wake and laugh, and know and see
Then with healed heart afresh catch up the clue,
And singing drop into my work anew.
If you ever teach a poetry class someday, can I be in your class?
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